Relationships can be more difficult and complicated, when we have an insecure attachment style. We might feel avoidant of big emotions or relationships altogether, or we might regularly feel very anxious and are afraid to lose our partner.

 

When we have an insecure attachment style ourselves, it can be difficult not to repeat the same with our own children. The early years can be very intense and challenging and a certain level of self-awareness and knowledge often help to be that secure base for our children.

 

I had the pleasure of training under KH Brisch, MD in the University Clinic of Munich, who has helped to make Attachment Theory and related practical knowledge more accessible to parents. I gained certificates in SAFE and BASE. I work with parents on reflecting their own ideas, strengths and vulnerabilities when it comes to their parental role. I provide knowledge based on science (Attachment Theory), which helps to navigate your way around important topics such as separation anxiety and sensitively meeting your child’s needs without disregarding your own needs continuously.

 

I believe techniques like Marshall Rosenberg’s “Non-Violent Communication (NVC)” -- also referred to as Compassionte Communication -- can be a valuable tool to make a safe connection with self and others. Years of conditioning have manifested a language of blame, shame, bribery or accusation when conflict arises. Non-violent communication can help to connect to our and others feelings, needs and vulnerability. 

 

In Rumi’s words:

“Out beyond ideas of  wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.”